I DON'T WANT TO WORK OUT!!!

I mentioned in a previous blog how we sometimes don't know what is standing in the way of our healing or personal growth. I would like to share one of my seemingly unachievable goals that has plagued me in recent years; my inability to establish and maintain an exercise routine.

I know all the reasons why I should work out, from keeping bone density, to being strong enough to live on my own for decades to come. There are so many great reasons, yet I just could not get my act together and go to the gym. In my 30s I even worked with a trainer, spent 12 hours a week at the gym, and was in the best shape of my life. I knew I could do it, because I had already done it. Yet until recently, I couldn't find my groove.

I joined a fitness center in town three times in the past 4-1/2 years. My health insurance pays for the membership, since they recognize how important exercise is for overall health and wellness. So here I am, joining, and not working out. My membership lapsed, and I decided to wait for a good time to rejoin. Well, there is never a good time, but I rejoined with my son and husband after a 6-month hiatus. I told myself I was going to be better this time around. But my family didn't go, I tweaked my back, and once I recovered, I never went back either. It was really quite ridiculous. I took another 8-month hiatus.

For my third attempt, I asked for a 2-week trial before committing to a full membership. By now, the fitness team knew me and my motivational challenges very well. I went twice during the trial and then... nothing. I was baffled by my own behavior. I know how to work out. I know why I should work out. I have done it before. What was stopping me?

I called a friend of mine who is the same age as I am and works out almost daily. I unraveled to her, vehemently expressing "I don't WANT to go, I DON'T want to go, I don't want to GO, I DON'T WANT TO GO!!!!!!" She listened patiently, and when I was done, she gently said: "Maybe there's something else going on." She was right.

I decided to do a little self-healing work on this issue. I asked my higher self and guides what was blocking me from going to the gym. The answer surprised me. I had an unconscious belief that if I got fit and strong, I would attract unwanted attention. This belief was rooted in experiences from my past — experiences I thought I had long since dealt with.

Once I identified the block, I worked on dissolving it. I used a combination of dowsing, intention, and energy work to clear the old belief and replace it with a new, empowering one: that I deserve to be strong and healthy, and that my body is my own.

The result? I rejoined the gym. I have been going consistently for several months now. I actually enjoy it. I feel stronger, more energized, and more like myself than I have in years.

Now, was this block the only thing standing between me and the gym? In the grand scheme of things, it probably isn't. The takeaway here is understanding that sometimes unseen blocks can prevent us from acting in our own best interest, even when we know what we 'should' be doing. Discovering and dissolving unseen blocks is a really rewarding aspect of the work I do. I would love to help you move forward with your goals when you are ready.